A SEMI- SERIOUS VIEW ON THE FASCINATING CONCEPT OF PRODUCTIVITY
Yeah… productivity at home! Something we all want to have but in reality… can’t adapt either because we have kids (God help you if they’re teenagers or like ask too many questions) or simply because home is just too comfortable. So how do you separate your home space from your work space, At home?
To help us we’ve asked an Alien from planet ZimZlock, Karen who talks to managers (his actual name) an expert on working from home to tell us how we can adjust from the lifestyle. Karen who talks to managers, has been working from home and is also an expert prober and development expert who happens to write poetry
GETZ: So Karen who talks to manager, how did you start working from home?
K.W.T.T.M: First I’d like to say, thank you for abbreviating my name! It’s utterly charming. I feel like a radio station owned by a truther.
Thank you very much! Well I started to work from home, when my government, Yes we have them in Zimzlock too, was invaded by a mysterious virus that made our tentacles fall. It was just horrendous. The only way to prevent it was to stay at indoors for weeks. Much like your situation.
GETZ: Fascinating! It’s surprising how even though we’re from two different worlds. Our situation is too similar! So how did you stay productive?
K.W.T.T.M: Well at first, I decided to come up with solutions to ease with the pandemic. It was so… horrendous. as you know, a prober needs to have physical contact with others and that was pretty much out of the question. So I decided to focus on my poetry. That helped me a lot.
GETZ: But what did you do to be press on K? Can I call you K?
K.W.T.T.M: No… don’t do that! It’s actually a curse word in our language! It means WORD REDACTED
GETZ: Oh MY sorry!
K.W.T.T.M: Anyway, I decided to break tasks to ten minute mini-tasks. For instance, if it was poetry I would sit down and do rhyming exercises. Then if it turns out, I liked spending ten minutes on that task. It felt like being a super duper fun way of doing things without them piling up. Suddenly I broke everything I did into ten minute exercises. A world full of productivity was open to me. It was beautiful. I was writing more poetry! I was researching! Like crazy and I was exercising! Even the hard tasks felt easy!
GETZ: Isn’t that something?
K.W.T.T.M: it truly is. You’d be surprised to dis- cover that even the hardest tasks like finding ways to expel the virus on unsuspecting planets was discovered using this trick.
GETZ: Wait… what?
K.W.T.T.M: Nothing… carry on?
GETZ: Okay! What about other tips?
K.W.T.T.M: You have to keep in touch with friends! You have to stay positive… because these are tough times! And being productive stems from having a good mental health state. Remember sexiness and productivity comes from the inside. Take care of number 1 and those around you!
GETZ: Thank you for these wonderful tips! It was very enlightening to hear you speak!
K.W.T.T.M: It was my pleasure to help humans in their times of crisis. That’s why we’re hear to help you fight the virus like we got rid of it!
GETZ: So how did the ten minute rule help with the end of the pandemic there?
K.W.T.T.M: Well…. Little by little we dumped the virus out of our system by inventing this machine that tracked and captured it.
GETZ: Where did you dump it?
K.W.T.T.M: Somewhere far!
GETZ: How far?
K.W.T.T.M: far far away?
GETZ: What was the virus again?
K.W.T.T.M: It was very similar to yours but not yours!
GETZ: How similar? DID YOU DUMP IT HERE?
K.W.T.T.M: NO! WHAT…. NO…. WHAT? GIANT FLASH!
In all seriousness. Ten minutes are all you need to get yourself started. It’s all about making the task less difficult than it appears. Staying productive is part of what will make you a healthier creative. Do what you can. Look at this as an opportunity to finish that one project that’ll propel you to stardom.. or whatever it is you hope to be.
And no.. Aliens didn’t start this pandemic. But do wash your hands frequently as you can and avoid contact with the outside world as much as possible. Only go out for the essentials, if you can. If you can’t protect yourself as best you can. It is unfair and it is going to hit us hard but hopefully with kindness and a level headed attitude. We can beat this thing and come out even stronger.
I hope we don’t have to repeat this but only trust the WHO and the Ministry of Public health on this. Garlic, ginger, feto, onions, chilly and vitamin-c and D are good ways to beat your immune system or develop an ulcer (if that’s what you want) but not a cure for COVID-19. Stay informed. Stay Safe and happy getzing. Also help those around you. Like by donating to tele’s 444 thing, (IT PISSES US OFF TOO! Remember why we couldn’t post the links… because they wouldn’t give us the right amount of data???) and and out if your elderly neighbour needs help with groceries or if there are those that can’t afford it help out in all the small ways you can. Now is that time to show how you can be a better person.
Also… wash your hands.. After reading this magazine or before!